Life is that quick

Life in the Click of a Shutter...

It was a breezy April 2014 night in Nashville. His guitar was strapped to his back while walking behind the Frist Center. It was as if time stood still during this photo - capturing his hair and beard floating...

The night will never be the same again for him and I don't even know his name, his age or where he is from. But, I do know that the second is etched in the past.

What if you only have 100 years or perhaps less? That's it - frozen in a moment only for what feels like a second when you look back, later in life - like the snap of a shutter.

"I'm fifteen for a moment
Caught in between ten and twenty
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
I'm twenty two for a moment
She feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars
Fifteen there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
Fifteen, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got hundred years to live
I'm thirty three for a moment
Still the man, but you see I'm of age
A kid on the way
A family on my mind
I'm forty five for a moment
The sea is high
And I'm heading into a crisis
Chasing the years of my life
Fifteen there's still time for you
Time to buy, time to lose yourself
Within a morning star
Fifteen I'm all right with you
Fifteen, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got hundred years to live
Half time goes by
Suddenly you're wise
Another blink of an eye
Sixty seven is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on
I'm ninety nine for a moment
Dying for just another moment
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
Fifteen there's still time for you
Twenty two I feel her too
Thirty three you're on your way
Every day's a new day
Fifteen there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey fifteen, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got hundred years to live"

- Song by Vladimir John Ondrasik III, better known as Five For Fighting - Titled "100 Years"

Enjoy life, no matter what

Some people say that if you don’t enjoy your job, perhaps you are in the wrong field. I say, if you can’t enjoy life, perhaps you’re in the wrong field.

“Lighten up, just enjoy life, smile more, laugh more, and don't get so worked up about things.”
-  Kenneth Branagh, Northern Irish actor, director

His mother called him Vernon

“My name is Vern and only my mom called me Vernon… God Rest her Soul,” he said when I accidentally called him Vernon misunderstanding his quiet whispers when he introduced himself.

He lives in a small apartment located in Nashville that looks more like a former motel. He talked about how crack dealers knew the hours of management and sold only certain times of the day.

“If I were asked to define Motherhood. I would have defined it as Love in its purest form. Unconditional Love.” -Revathi Sankaran

Are local squares in communities known for diversity?

It is amazing to look back at history and see the variety of events that have taken place on the square in Murfreesboro, TN. While the history is not always pretty, it is still intriguing to consider the magnitude of events that literally touch every race, background, religion or belief.

The first documented execution on the local square took place in 1813, according to research dug up by County Historian Greg Tucker. The deceased was described as a black male known only as “Jess.” The Sheriff at the time conducted the execution.

During the Civil War the Union Army took control of Murfreesboro and used the courthouse as an observation and signaling tower in 1862.

Many stories still circulate about a young stranger who happened upon Murfreesboro where he told a crowd that he would climb the courthouse. The man who came to be known as “The Human Fly” did indeed climb the courthouse in 1923 and made it to the top where he slipped and fell to his death while waving. By the way, his body was never identified.

Men draped in white robes, better known as the notorious Ku Klux Klan, marched around the square in 1987.

Uncle Dave Macon Days started on the lawn of the courthouse with banjo pickin’ fun in 1978 and continued on the square until 1989. At that point the event moved to Cannonsbugh.

In the late 80’s and early 90’s, go cart races happened around the courthouse. When curbs and islands of concrete were installed it killed the racing idea all together.

For years, the square has been the ending point for the annual Murfreesboro Christmas Parade.

Last year, Muslim Youth met on the square and handed out flowers and cards of encouragement to those passing by.

And now for the second year, the square has been the home to Boro Pride, celebrating the LGBT community - which is where this photo was taken this past Saturday.

Astonishing really to look back and simply observe the variety of groups and individuals that would normally clash.

In closing, a little diversity...

"Well I'm not the world's most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my Lola la-la-la-la Lola
Well I'm not dumb but I can't understand
Why she walk like a woman but talk like a man
Oh my Lola la-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola"

"Well I'm not the world's most masculine man
But I know what I am and I'm glad I'm a man
And so is Lola
La-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola
Lola la-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola"

-The Kinks, "LOLA" 1970

Looking Back: Life was a bit different then

Florence Browder was born in Smyrna, TN some 88 years ago in about 1929. Her life was positive and she raised two children… one of whom went on to graduate from college and become a teacher and another who retired from the U.S. Air Force.

Ms. Browder only made it to the 8th grade, which was very common in those days. Despite her lack of book education, she was smart and had dreams for her children, just as she still does today for her grandchildren and great grandchildren.

In 1929, the population of Rutherford County, Tennessee was just under 33,000 residents. Today it has grown considerably with approximately 300,000 residents. If you were to put that into percentages, Rutherford County has grown by 800% since 1929.

Silver Springs School is where Browder received her education and it is also where she went to church as a child. The building served two purposes in the 1930’s and 40’s. “It’s gone, it’s been gone,” she told me when describing where the school was once located on Florence Road. At the time, the school was in the rural country between Smyrna and Murfreesboro.

Silver Springs once boasted an attendance of 88 children in the 1940’s. When 1959 hit, the school saw a jump in students with 185 because another school called the Rosenwald School merged with Silver Springs.

The Rosenwald School was an African-American educational facility that was started in 1927 and eventually closed in 1960.

Looking back to her childhood she told me, “I always tell my great grandchildren that I wish I could swap with them and let them be raised when I was raised, they would’ve been raised better – I mean I’m trying to raise them, but they don’t understand – they don’t pay me no tention.” I told her, “I don’t think it’s you, I think it is everyone around them – society is quite different compared to when you were younger.”

Ms. Browder went on to explain her days as a child, “When the old people spoke you just did what they told you to do and no back talk. But now, the children just back talk and do whatever they want to.” 

In 1930, things were a little cheaper when compared to 2017…

• 1930 Average New Home $7,145… (2017 Average is $406,400 nationwide - 6/23/17)
• 1930 Average Annual Income $1,970… (2017 Average is $46,409 nationwide)
• 1930 Gallon of Fuel $0.10 Cents… (2017 Average is $2.38)
• 1930 New Car Average $640… (2017 Average is $34,968)
• 1930 One pound steak $0.20 Cents… (2017 Average is $5.20 per lb)
• 1930 Refrigerator (Electrolux gas) $144… (2017 there are hundreds from $350 to $5,000)
• 1930 Minimum Wage $0.25 Cents… (2017 Tennessee Min. Wage is $7.25)

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.” ― Sophia Loren

Boundaries?

Boundaries, who said we need those? She was a female barbarian…

In life we set these imaginary boundaries of what is off limits for males or females when in reality those limits should never be set to begin with. I am not talking about things that are taboo or bad, but instead things that anyone can do or should be able to do.

Take for example the right to vote. Prior to August 18, 1920 women were not allowed to vote in America. But why? It took over 70 years to make that right happen. In fact, the movement started in 1848.

It wasn’t until 1972 that discrimination based on sex was banned in America. It was called the Equal Rights Amendment. However, most of the wording for the amendment was first drafted in year 1923. The person who wrote it was Alice Paul who was born in 1885 and died just five years after the passage in 1977 at the age of 92, but she saw the change.

As for the boundary breaking woman photographed, she is part of a bachelorette party… her party. She will soon be married.

Benjamin Franklin once stated, “Being ignorant is not so much a shame, as being unwilling to learn.” I think that quote easily holds true today as many people are closed minded and unwilling to see both sides. Some are unwilling to learn the backgrounds of others to better understand why they made the choices they made.

Free will is something we were given by God. While some have free will that will lead to trouble, it is not for us as a society to judge. We can lead, but to conspire or form group hate will not lead anyone anywhere.

My thought is simple… How you decide to walk is not up to me, but I can lead in some small manner if I feel that I should. Keep in mind that I too may fall, but don’t judge me as I don’t judge you.

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” ― Anne Frank

Stay true to yourself

His words… “Stay true to yourself and don’t bend to other people.” He has done both, once the later in the past, but now only the first... at age 47 today. 

Don’t allow others to lead you in a direction that your heart tells you otherwise. Be honest with yourself and your desires in life. Communicate what you feel wholeheartedly.

Joan of Arc, who led the French Army at age 18 to victory over the English, once stated, “One life is all we have and we live it as we believe in living it. But to sacrifice what you are and to live without belief, that is a fate more terrible than dying.”

Sadly, Joan was later captured after her victory and burned at the stake. The young heroine of France died at age 19.

It can be dark

It is dark, but darkness is sometimes on the inside of those we meet, but sometimes we don't know.

His knuckles had the words tattooed in faded ink, “HATE” and “LOVE.” He told me, "I could feel it against the bone as he did it."

The word "HATE" was written backwards as "ETAH" and I have seen that before on tattoos. Some have told me they did that so they could read their tattoo themselves, which is commonly called "mirror writing." It is often the sign of a deteriorating brain.

It is not dyslexia, it is instead dysgraphia. The medical definition of dysgraphia is, “The impairment of the ability to write caused by brain damage,” according to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary. It can be a symptom of brain disease.

But why such a contrasting tattoo of love and hate?

I asked the man who was in his late sixties “Why?” He then went back to a time when he was behind bars… “It was a prison tattoo in the 70’s – I figured it would fade away in a year or so. But, it’s still here over 40-years later.”

I couldn’t settle for such an answer so I pressed on. “But why,” I asked him again. “I liked to fight back then and I liked the idea of the tattoo on my fingers, so I did it,” he said quietly as cars passed by on a busy Nashville street.

Still, not the in depth answer I was looking for. I wanted to hear about his inner fight of being good verses being evil. His response to such nonsense, “Back then I was young and dumb – Today I am old and foolish.”

In the 1953 novel by David Grubb entitled “The Night of the Hunter,” the fictional character Reverend Harry Powell had Love and Hate tattooed on his fingers. The character was a known con-artist in the story and also a serial killer. Perhaps it was that novel that spurred others to get such tattoos?

In the book, the character of Reverend Powell gives a sermon on the struggles between good and evil while using his inked knuckles as an example while preaching. On one hand you have love, on the other you have hate.

The story was set in the 1930’s and the Reverend spread the word of God while befriending rich widows and later killing them while gaining their fortunes. In other words, the good was the spreading of the word followed by his bad acts of murder.

The tattoos were later made clearer when the novel became a movie in 1955. In fact, the “LOVE” and “HATE” is one of the most iconic images in film history still today, all because of the movie. Since the 50’s, multiple characters have had similar or the same tattoos.

Rev. Powell in “The Night of the Hunter” was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Perhaps a scary combination that is seen in multiple serial killers throughout history. In 1955 the film was far from popular. No one wanted to see a traveling preacher who was also capable of such evil. No one wanted to be reminded that evil was so vivid, clever and charming at the same time.

While I am not suggesting the hands pictured belong to someone of evil doings, it does make me think twice when I see such tattoos. It is almost a caution sign to remind me that some people battle with true inner evil that is extreme to the point where they have it tattooed onto their body as a reminder.

The hands pictured did prison time for robbery, but perhaps more before being caught – which is why I wanted to focus on the hands as opposed to the face in this photo.

It is a reminder for all of us, because we all have such battles. However, some are much more extreme.

“When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide
It’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close
It’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide
It’s where my demons hide”
-Imagine Dragons, Demons

Food, Drug and Alcohol Addictions

Scroll down for audio interview

The old saying of you can't judge a book by its cover is quite true today. This is one story where you may look at the photo and later have second thoughts after hearing the message.

Ericia Baggett was bullied throughout her school years due to her weight. "People would mistreat me," she said. Nevertheless, she found an escape in artwork. During middle school and high school she won numerous awards for her talent. One of her pictures was even hung in the Governor's Mansion. But, the art would only take her so far and the other children likely failed to notice her talent.

Due to her weight she stated that she "developed" at a young age. That early development lead to additional problems on the daily school bus ride home. "I would get harassed on the school bus and held down and boys would..." she paused and took a breath. She then talked about how such behavior was not handled the same way as it is today. In the 1980's, such behavior received a slap on the wrist. Today, that same behavior ends with an arrest.

At age 20 she got married and soon found herself with a newborn baby. Her artwork was on the backburner while depression took over along with more weight gain. Baggett said that she ate for comfort, "The only way I knew how to deal with things was by eating." She then continued to describe what was later learned to be destructive behavior, "As long as I was eating I was taking care of myself, stuffing those emotions down."

In an effort to feel better about herself, Baggett said that she received surgery to reduce her weight, which had risen to 349 pounds. The art was picked back up and the idea of becoming a tattoo artist was something that was growing for her. However, more problems followed shortly after the operation.

"When I had the surgery it took that feeling away," she said in describing how food once comforted her. After the operation she didn't feel like eating as much. When Baggett ran away from her addiction to food, she turned to alcohol. When the alcohol didn't work for her, she turned to meth, cocaine and crack. Her once healthy escape with art seemed to have disappeared.

Finally, Baggett decided that she needed to fix whatever was hurting. So, she spent time recovering at Cumberland Heights while realizing that the hole she needed to fill lacked God. The 40 year old Nashville native said, "Once I quit doing drugs I was like - What's gonna' fill this spot?" With a pause she finished... "Then I ran to God."

Road blocks were not completely fixed for Baggett. She later practiced in "Cutting" to deal with anxiety and depression. Her upper thigh hidden by her clothing, was marred with multiple small cuts and scars. During that time she started to be bullied again, this time by adults. Of course this time around she knew about healthy verses unhealthy habits which is why she decided to get help right away for the cutting and once again start focusing on art. She also understood that hurting people - hurt people... so the bullying directed at her was because others around her had issues of their own.

Today, her dream is to continue moving forward with artwork and to open her own tattoo studio. Someday, she wants to operate a tattoo studio on a level that is not usually expected in such places... She wants to tell people who look like her, yet are different on the inside, that they too can turn to God as opposed to running from one addiction to another.

To hear the entire 19 MIN and 48 SEC Interview, listen below:

CONNECT: Find her on FaceBook under her tattoo artist name of Alayna Devine at https://www.facebook.com/alayna.devine.79

“When you encourage others, you in the process are encouraged because you're making a commitment and difference in that person's life. Encouragement really does make a difference.”- Zig Ziglar, Motivational Speaker (1926-2012)

He is blind and homeless and now recovering after getting hit by a car

My friend Levi, who is homeless and living in the Nashville area, was recently hit by a car along with his mother Debbie. I wanted to post this about a week ago, but he insisted I wait until he gets out of the hospital. After speaking with him tonight he said to go ahead and post it.

Levi who is blind, was walking across a busy intersection with his mother when a car struck the two. It left Levi with a shattered ankle that required surgery. It left his mother with scrapes and bruises, but she too is doing better. She also has a boot on her left leg that she has to wear, although I don’t know how long.

The car that struck the two fled the scene and Metro Police have been unable to track it down. Of course Levi could not see the car which was not realized by officers until several minutes of questioning, according to him. Debbie did not see the vehicle and was likely busy making sure Levi was okay after the incident.

Life changes in the blink of an eye for everyone, no matter the social level. However, when those changes take place when you are already down, it makes it even harder to get up.

Luckily for Levi, it looks as if he will not be on a walker for long. However, being blind, homeless and on a walker won’t be easy for Debbie who is in her sixties or for Levi who is in his mid-thirties.

“Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change.” ― Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley, English novelist (1797-1851)

Quite the fight in a city park

I always like to stumble across interesting photos or stories. This one was taken in Barfield Park (Murfreesboro, TN).

Medieval combat is a sport that few maybe familiar with. However, you may have seen it unfolding at a local park and you failed to recognize exactly what was going on.

The sport, that involves role-playing as if you were from the Medieval times, is all about taking down your opponent with a sponge sword or perhaps a foam bat of sorts.

A local organization called Dagorhir (pronounced Dagger-Here) meets at Barfield Crescent Park on Sundays and fight. Not fighting that ends in injury, but fighting that ends with a clear winner or a clear loser. It's a game.

In Medieval times there was no acting. Instead, fighters literally fought to the death. Depending on their level of training, some made their fight appear to be a dance the way they jumped, dodged and returned blows with swords and shields in hand.

But in Murfreesboro, they don't fight to the death. They simply reenact such fighting with foam swords and depending on where someone is hit - they either survive and stay in the game or they are, figuratively speaking - killed and are out for the round.

Scott, who goes by the nickname or role-play name of Zaen (Pronounced Zane) stated...

"I'll fight, till from my bones my flesh be hacked." 
- William Shakespeare

Is it a Mountain Lion or Bobcat that Jim Found?

Imagine finding a Mountain Lion in your back yard. Well, that is what happened to Jim Kutz in Lebanon, Tennessee.Needless to say, I had to check it out.

The photo above is of Jim showing me his video. And the video - well, you will have to look at it to decide if it is indeed a mountain lion.

Kutz, who lives at the KOA Campground in Wilson County, saw signs of a possible cougar living on a 200 acre tract of land behind the campground. So, Kutz set up a nighttime wildlife camera and quickly saw a large adult cougar and about three cubs.

The TWRA states on their website: "This powerful predator ranges from 5 to 8 ½ feet in total length and weighs from 70 to 250 pounds, with males being bigger than females. Their ears are black on the upper side and are a small and rounded with no tufts of hair. The muzzle is white on the end and black where it joins the head."

As for where the cougar (or mountain lion) was spotted... it was in the area of where I-40 and I-840 merge - close to HWY 109 in Lebanon.

According to the TWRA, the cougar is the largest feline animal in North America. Until very recently, there haven't been any cougars in Tennessee since the early 1900's. Similar to Tennessee's wild elk and buffalo, the cougar was near extinct due to over hunting and habitat loss. However, the cougar may be making a comeback in Tennessee.

The Unexpected Surprises of Life

Jacklyn had a bike accident and was hit by a truck, she told me. The pickup left the scene which left her with scratches and bruises on her face. She also lost 3 teeth in the mishap. "My smile was everything, that meant a lot and now I am missing teeth," she said. Jacklyn said she doesn't feel comfortable smiling after the accident that unfolded on Monday, August 28, 2017.

Gregg, her boyfriend sitting to her right, was once a meth user but quit as he aged. Tragedy has been part of his life and he spoke of his step son who committed suicide in the past by walking head first into a moving train. 

He told me that he once framed houses while keeping his step son and wife housed in a hotel. Gregg said in describing the step son, "He despised drinking because me and his mom were drunks." While talking about the reason for the suicide he stated, "I think because the way me and his mom turned to methamphetamine's and stuff, which we don't do no more..." He paused and continued, "I guess he heard the train a long ways away and he just started walking with two knives in his hand (super mad) - and he started walking to the tracks and ambushed the train head on."

After the incident Gregg and his wife attempted counseling while being clean, but the death was too much to conquer. He is no longer married and is now with his girlfriend Jacklyn on the streets of Middle Tennessee. 

You never know what someone went through or is going through upon first glance. There is always more than meets the eye. 

“The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.” ― Jiddu Krishnamurti

No Legs? Not a problem for Ms. Murray

Ronald Batick depends on his scooter to run errands, visit doctors and to get groceries. Recently, he had a minor scooter accident when he hit a rock. The run-in caused Batick’s scooter to flip over, throwing him on the concrete sidewalk.

Sharon Murray was on her scooter when she saw what happened to Mr. Batick. Keep in mind, she is a total stranger to Batick and was just at the right place at the right time to lend a hand.

What is unusual about this story is that Ms. Murray has no legs from the knee down. Her lower legs had to be amputated after blood clots were found in the past. Needless to say, she didn’t let that stop her from helping Batick.

Ms. Murray hopped out of her scooter landing on her knees and made her way over to Batick. She then used her upper body strength to push the scooter upright. Batick said, “I couldn’t have done it without her.”

The good news is that Batick was not hurt and he was able to drive away on his scooter while making a new friend. As for Ms. Murray, she learned to walk on her knees many years ago and said, "I couldn't get use to prosthetics."

“Keep your face always toward the sunshine – and shadows will fall behind you.” –Walt Whitman

Fragile Lives

Life is so fragile and the hurt we may cause to another can easily last a lifetime. That hurt can manifest itself in different ways depending on the past abuse, whatever it may be.

We only live on this planet once and to see those who are hurting, lonely or addicted should be a reminder as we quietly pass them by avoiding eye contact – that we should notice them. Their hurt could have easily been our hurt. Or, perhaps their pain is similar to ours, we just know how to hide it better.

I guess we should all remember that without pain, there could be no joy. Without lies, there would be no truth. Without bad, then what would we label as “Good?”

Life is highlighted with context and contrast and that contrast can be stronger at times.

Take Helen Keller for example, she was both deaf and blind. Can you imagine? However, she saw goodness everywhere with every step. It could be argued that she saw that goodness because she never physically saw the hurt with her own eyes. But, I think the argument could also be made that she never saw or heard the goodness of life, yet felt it always and she never gave up regardless of her limitations. Keller once stated, “Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it.”

“Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.” - Oscar Wilde

Face of Music City - He looks like Johnny Cash

The outside looking in: Face of Nashville… He looks just like the late Johnny Cash and he use to sit on Broadway and play older Cash songs like The Ring of Fire.

"The taste of love is sweet
When hearts like ours meet. 
I fell for you like a child
Oh, but the fire went wild. 
I fell into a burnin' ring of fire

I went down, down, down
And the flames went higher
And it burns, burns, burns, 
The ring of fire, the ring of fire."

While some may not know it, the song “Ring of Fire” was written by June Carter Cash and Merle Kilgore and recorded by Johnny Cash.

It was originally recorded by Junes sister Anita Carter for her “Folk Songs Old and New” album in 1963 and later that year mastered by Johnny Cash (March 25, 1963). It went on to become one of the biggest hits of Cash's career.

The song was basically about June falling in love with Johnny, which was indeed happening at the time when she wrote it.

Traditional Birthday in India

I recently had the honor of attending an Indian birthday party for a friends' daughter who has deep roots to India and family still living there. It was extremely different from the type of birthday party I am familiar with. The party was held in Murfreesboro.

Of course, there was the traditional birthday cake and all the children running around, some quietly sticking their fingers in the icing when they thought no one was looking. There was also music, friends and family present, just as one would see at an American birthday party. The difference however, was the theme of praying for the child celebrating her big number two. The secondary difference included real (and really good, but real spicy) Indian food. It was a huge dinner followed by desert and the desert followed by birthday cake.

During the beginning of the event father John Spurgeon asked that several family members and friends join him and his wife by laying hands on their small child while praying for blessings, good health and positive influences over her life. Some of those friends were Tennessee natives while others were from India. It was nice to see the clash of backgrounds and colors and coming together in prayer.

The dinner that I previously mentioned, was excellent. I Iove spicy foods and this was top notch.

In India, it is customary to finish what you are served and most of the guest who were from India, would have proud mothers as they were part of the clean plate club. The food was followed by a plate of Indian rice pudding, which tasted almost like a cinnamon cobbler. It was extremely good.

When the cake was cut the children surrounding it did not dive into it as one might expect. Instead, friends took turns feeding a slice of cake to the two-year-old birthday girl. The child patiently waited as she enjoyed her cake bite by bite.

It was a very positive event for sure and educational.

About John Spurgeon:

John is a pastor with New Vision Baptist Church in Murfreesboro. He is in charge of the jail ministry and works with those who are incarcerated in our community.

Pastor Spurgeon is originally from India where he grew up. His father, who is a Baptist preacher in India, is well known for hosting large church services in the country that is predominantly made up of those who follow the Hindu belief system.

Growing up as a Baptist in India is somewhat rare. The Indian subcontinent is the birthplace of four of the world's major religions; namely Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism and Sikhism.

Major Religions in India and the percentage of followers:

• 80.5% Hindu religion
• 13.4% Muslims
• 2.3% Christians
• 1.9% Sikh
• 0.80% Buddhists
• 0.4% Jain

At 51, Brenda looks back on her child abuse

One look into her icy blue eyes and you can see her pain from years past.

Today, Brenda is 51 and has turned to alcohol, meth and crack cocaine to heal her wounds, which she may not have fully known existed. She turned to prostitution and was even homeless for multiple years and the trajectory of her life was greatly changed when she was only a kid all because of child sex abuse.

Child sex abuse is a major problem in our community and across the country. The scars from the abuse can last a lifetime and Brenda, who just got into housing through the Murfreesboro Housing Authority, can confirm the pain.

According to the United States Department of Justice, only 30% of sexual assault cases are reported. Brenda was one of the cases that never went to police over 40 years ago. Furthermore, many children wait until adulthood to tell of the abuse, which is often too late as alcoholism, drug abuse and more have already manifested itself in the victim.

As for Brenda, her step father later died and she suggested that she confronted him while he was in the hospital. While he never admitted to it, she said he did apologize.

Listen to the full interview below (7 MIN and 26 SEC):

Some good news in the arrests of perpetrators… In years past, child sex abuse was not as heavily investigated as it is today. In the past, false information was promoted by professionals that children frequently reported false accounts of abuse. Over the years it was realized that such ideas lacked systematic evidence that false allegations are common, according to the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children.

“The greater a child’s terror, and the earlier it is experienced, the harder it becomes to develop a strong and healthy sense of self.” ― Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

To report suspected child abuse of any kind in Tennessee, call 877-237-0004 and remain anonymous. You can also report suspected abuse online at https://apps.tn.gov/carat/.  

Monday Total Eclipse Facts (8/21/2017):

Above photo taken on the Murfreesboro, Tennessee Square

Monday Total Eclipse Facts (8/21/2017):

1. Oregon to South Carolina is where the Total Eclipse hit today and most Americans were within a day's drive to the path of totality.
    
2. A solar eclipse is a lineup of the Sun, the Moon, and Earth.
    
3. If you were in an area that was outside of the slice that saw the total eclipse, you at least saw a partial eclipse. In fact, everyone in the continental U.S. should have at least seen a partial eclipse.
    
4. If you were slightly south of Carbondale, Illinois, in Giant City State Park, then you saw the total eclipse for a whopping 2 minutes and 40.2 seconds, the longest time frame in America.
    
5. The sun is 400 times larger than that of the Moon.
    
6. Solar retinopathy can be caused by staring at the sun (regardless of its phase), but few people can stand to look directly at our nearest star for very long without pain.|
    
7. Isaac Newton tried looking at the sun in a mirror, essentially blinding himself for three days and experiencing afterimages for months.
    
8. A total solar eclipse occurred on June 17, 1909. The path of totality crossed the Arctic ocean, Canada, Greenland, central Russia, and central Asia.
    
9. The last partial eclipse visible in Tennessee took place on October 23, 2014.
    
10. The average width for the path of totality in Tennessee is 71.5 miles across.
     
11. Before 2017, the last total eclipse visible in Nashville and Murfreesboro was on July 29, 1478. However, there were annular eclipses at sunrise on Dec. 25, 1628, and Oct. 19, 1865.
     
12. As for the time everyone spent outside watching the sun on Monday, American businesses lost nearly $700 million in productivity, according to an estimate by outplacement company Challenger, Gray & Christmas.

Below photo taken on the Murfreesboro, Tennessee Square

Laughter can be everything

A few days back I visited my homeless friend Levi at his Nashville camp and dropped of a little dinner for him and his mother. One thing he always does is joke... which is good as laughter is great for anyone.

A Jewish Proverb I once read stated, "As soap is to the body, so laughter is to the soul." I believe that, laughter makes you feel better almost instantly.

As for Levi, he is blind and his joke of the day this past week was, "I'm going to look directly at the Total Eclipse, all it could do is help," among a few other Eclipse ideas.

Levi, who lost a daughter about 8 years ago to death at only about 5 months of age struggles daily, but gets through. I can't imagine #1 The death of a daughter and #2 Being blind. For that matter, I also have a hard time imagining being homeless while struggling with number one and two.

Laughter is medicine:

In a medical article about “Patch Adams,” laughter is described as a natural medicine.

Hunter Campbell, M.D., the American physician whose life inspired the 1998 movie “Patch Adams,” took laughter therapy to a new level.

“Hazardous to illness, humor leads to laughing, smiling, and good feelings” (Bakerman). It’s undeniable – both humor and laughter can make you feel good and take the edge off of seemingly difficult situations. Humor is a great communication tool to relieve tension between people and facilitate relationship-building. As a coping mechanism, humor helps people diffuse difficult emotions such as anger, fear, grief, and sadness. In hospital settings humor can help both patients and their families by giving everyone permission to laugh and relax.

Humor and/or laughter can also alleviate emotional stress, which enhances health by helping to prevent stress-related illness. Remember that the sustained release of stress, or “fight or flight,” hormones can contribute significantly to hypertension, nervous system disorders, and other health complications. Besides diminishing stress, humor and/or laughter can simply make us feel better and put us in good spirits." - HeartMD Institute.