Life and the Many Faces

Camera in Hand: When you approach a total stranger with a camera in hand, they never know what to expect. The “Why my photo” is usually the first thought that comes to mind. I often wonder if the person I photograph at first feels anger in the their thought of – “He is going to take my picture to be mean.” If so, it is interesting to watch their expression change as we begin to talk. Frame by frame you can see their 43 facial muscles relax. It is as if a relief falls over their fear.  

It has Happened: Before I ever had a chance to talk I have had cold coffee thrown at me. Luckily, I stepped back before I was hit by the flying liquid. One time I had a man take a swing at me after assuming I thought he was from Mexico as opposed to Puerto Rico – even though I never said a single word to him and was actually photographing someone else.  Regardless, he missed and I smiled as I told him to have a good day. I have been cussed at – one “F” word after the other. In that case, I later served the man lunch while volunteering at a day shelter in Washington, DC.

It seems as if 99% of the time, most of those that I meet on the street leave with a smile and an urge to share their story with others. Those who don’t want to talk – don’t. That does not mean I don’t leave them with a sleeping bag or another item that is needed to survive. It just means that we don’t use the camera and their story remains locked up tight inside their vault.  

“I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen. ”

— Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961)

Are your eyes focused?

Sometimes we see things that we think are in front of us because our mind is telling our eyes what to believe.

However, we are often wrong when we judge a person for the clothing they wear, the place they call home or even the children they raise.

What we think we may see of the shaggy clothes that drape from a mans body are perhaps the only clothing he has. In seeing those tattered rags, we may come to the conclusion that he is on drugs, an alcoholic or mentally mad. While all three of those ideas could be 100% spot on, do you ever ask what caused such? 

If we stop to find out what caused madness and / or addiction and recognize them as symptoms as opposed to the main problem - then we start to understand more and see a much larger picture. Then... our eyes become focused as our imagination takes a pause. 

“You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.”

— Mark Twain

Raining in the streets

“Let the rain kiss you. Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops. Let the rain sing you a lullaby.”

— Langston Hughes

On stage at Starwood in Nashville, TN

“Music should strike fire from the heart of man, and bring tears from the eyes of woman.”

— Ludwig van Beethoven

I took this photo of a friend of mine a couple of years ago on what was once the stage at Starwood Amphitheater in Nashville. The outdoor concert venue was alive with sound and people not to far in the past.

More on Starwood:

(1985 to 2007) What was is no more: Starwood opened in 1985 to the sounds of Van Halen, Aerosmith, Ted Nugent, and Motley Crew, just to name a few. Today, it looks like an epic ghost town of broken concrete, asphalt paths to nowhere, broken tiles that once lined the greenroom and overgrown grass.

Over the years, the concert venue changed names about three times. Up until 1999 it was called Starwood Amphitheater. The name changed in '99 to the First American Music Center. The First American name only lasted for one year. In 2000, it was renamed the AmSouth Amphitheater. It also closed with that name of "AmSouth" in 2007.

Life in Tennessee

LIFE: He grew up in Murfreesboro and has always called it home. 

He has never been married... did he ever find that true love? He has never had children... but did he want any? 

He was kind and enjoyed our brief conversation. He talked about his school days at McFadden and later Central High School, which is now Central Magnet School. 

His brothers... he spoke highly of. He smiled, "Are you taking pictures for a class," he asked me. I then explained to him that I simply photograph people and tell their story. 

Next time I see Mr. Haley, I will ask more questions. He has stories to tell and the luxury of time to tell them. 

"Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify." - Henry David Thoreau

Magic...

“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places.”

— Roald Dahl

The simple things

He goes by the nickname of John John and lives in the small town of Shelbyville, TN. He was standing near the gas pumps when he approached me, “Sir, could you buy me a Coca-Cola?” I smiled and said, “Sure.” Then, “Could you buy me something to eat?” I laughed and responded, “Sure, pick out something here.”

The gas station clerk looked at the man and said, “John John, we are out of your favorite popcorn.” She told me, “He likes the cheddar popcorn, but we run out quick because he buys all of them when we get them in.” Apparently, the small filling station only gets five of the cheddar popcorn’s in as John John seems to be the only customer for them.

While paying, “Sir, could you take me to Burger King and get me a burger?” I chuckled, “How about this candy bar and chips?” He quietly said, “Okay, that is good.”

He then walked away into the darkness. He lives in a small trailer park in Shelbyville and hangs out at the filling station when not at work.

"What's fulfilling is being happy and being able to help other people. The simple things." - James Arthur, British singer-songwriter

“What’s fulfilling is being happy and being able to help other people. The simple things.”

— James Arthur, British singer-songwriter

The Eldorado Motel of Nashville - Where those of color could spend the night

The vintage sign read, “Eldorado Motel, Room Phones, Pool and TV.” The sign still stands today in between 28th Avenue and Clarksville Pike in Nashville. However, the only sign of the motel is the sign itself.

I spoke to the owner of the property who said that her father was one of the first black men in Tennessee to receive a bank loan to build a motel.

What makes the motel history stand out even more, is that it was one of the few places in Nashville that allowed for men and women of color to spend the night.

During the changing times of the 1960’s, musicians like BB King, The Temptations, and even James Brown stayed at the motel while visiting Music City.

In the 1960’s, the  Southern Christian Leadership Conference (SCLC)  booked two rooms at the property for Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and musician Harry Belafonte. King was good friends with Belafonte who supported the SCLC financially. Belafonte was in town to play at the Ryman Auditorium, but became too ill to play. So, he recouped at the motel until he was well enough to travel home.

Learn more by listening to the short interview below with the daughter of the man who built the Eldorado Motel so many years ago. 

The bare feet of Hippie Hill

August 2017: Hippie Hill is known for bare feet and hippies. While it is true that not everyone on the hill is barefoot, the hippie ideals of accepting others has always been alive in the small community.

“On stage, I make love to 25,000 different people, then I go home alone.”

— Janis Joplin (1943-1970, died at 27)

The future of the hill is somewhat up in the air as far as living arrangements go. It appears as if the government has been cracking down on their use of campers verses tent living.

It all has to do with zoning and it being called a primitive camping area verses a campground that allows for long term RV parking, etc.

Sometimes you have to look at the bigger picture… Government getting too involved.

While rules are rules, it makes sense to allow for special permits when many who would normally be on the streets are currently living in a community where they feel safe. It is hard to feel safe under a bridge by yourself.

Fly Away Rocky

Some of you may recall Rocky. She once lived in a closed down and decaying motel in Nashville. No running water, no electricity... only the shell of a motel with mattresses and headboards fixed to the wall.

After moving back to her home state, reuniting with her daughter and getting sober... she found that her life was against the ticking clock.

In her last remaining days she was cared for by her daughter and her ex-husband.

Rocky passed away this past Friday shortly after midnight. She died with her daughter holding one hand and her ex holding the other.

Despite that title of "ex," he wanted so badly to see her feel good, to see her laughing with their daughter - - and he did.

"We must be conscious of this; one day, the life we have, will be gone." -Lailah Gifty Akita

R.I.P. Rocky 3/2/2018

America has one of the largest prison populations in the world

Maximum security sunrise: In 2015 Newsweek Magazine reported that over 2.2 million people are incarcerated in American jails or prisons.  America has the largest jail/prison population in the world.

If those numbers are hard to imagine, think of it this way:

If you took the population of Delaware and multiplied it by two and then added the population of Rutherford County, TN - - you would have the number of those behind bars in the United States.

Or… If you took the population of Washington D.C.  and multiplied it by three and then added 156,490 people - - you would have the number of those behind bars in the United States.

The number of men and women behind bars is larger than the population of 16 U.S. states.

Still not easy enough to wrap your mind around? More people are sitting in American jail or prison cells than the population of 87 different countries around the world.

Jail Vs. Prison Basics:

If you didn’t realize it, jail and prison are very different. Those who are in a prison have already gone through court proceedings and were found guilty. Their time behind bars is usually one year to life.

Typically, those who are in jail are awaiting their trial or unable to make bond. Others sitting in jails across the country are being held for misdemeanor crimes that don’t exceed 11 months and 29 days. Of course, you could be in a jail longer if convicted of multiple misdemeanor charges or if you are enrolled in a special program.

Children without Parents:

The Casey Foundation reported that over 5 million children in the United States have had at least one parent behind bars at one point or another. Those numbers equal one out of every fourteen kids who have had a parent behind bars during their toddler, early childhood or adolescent years.  

The cost of bars:

The cost to keep inmates in confinement equals around $70 billion annually, according to WIRED.com.

Why has the prison population spiked since 1980?

Prison and local jail populations have skyrocketed in the United States over the past 35+ years, but why? Some would blame the problem on laws surrounding marijuana or alcohol consumption. Those who blame such are only correct by a fraction.

Mental Illness is the real contributor to the increased prison and jail system populations.

The Urban Institute reports that over 60% of local jail inmates have mental problems while nearly the same number present mentally ill symptoms.  

State prisoners also have a lot of the same issues as local jails. In state prisons, over 55% of inmates have some type of mental problem and another 48% or so show symptoms.

At the Federal prison level, about 45% of inmates have mental issues while 40% show mentally ill symptoms, according to the Urban Institute.

What are your thoughts on the words racial tension?

Five people with three from Tennessee, one from New York and one from Colorado... One question asked: "What is the first thought into your head when you hear the words Racial Tension?”

“In the biological sense, race does not exist.”

— Abhijit Naskar, famous Neuroscientists and advocate of global harmony

Violence, Trauma and Children

Black, white, red, tan or brown… those who live a life of violence, hurt, crime, addiction, relationship issues, etc. typically have one thing in common: Childhood trauma

I have been thinking about this project I came across in Chattanooga. It is in an area that is known for violence, increased arrests, drug sales, etc.

The project is called FACE to FACE and it shares thoughts of children in East Chattanooga by way of art.

It is always interesting to me that some of the most talented youth live in some of the most crime ridden areas of America. The arts is their escape from childhood pain experienced at home, an escape from the violence they witness on the street – art is the safe place for some.

The painted faces on the red, yellow and blue backdrop are self-portraits of the youth involved in the project. Some of the quotes written are their thoughts on violence.

One of the thoughts put into words:

“I live in East Chattanooga and I am affected by the poor housing. The lack of education and the lack of recreational activities for our youth. Also, there is a lot of drugs and gang violence. But on the real, East Chattanooga is rich with deep history and people.”

The brick archway was once the entrance to Delanie Park and later the Highway 58 Drive-In Movie Theater. Now, it is an overgrown field, but perhaps an open field to more positive growth in the city.

This mural was put together between 2013 and 2014 and still stands in 2018 with natural growth, but without vandalism.

In closing... Black, white, red, tan or brown - - those who live a life of violence, hurt, crime, addiction, relationship issues, etc. typically have one thing in common: Childhood trauma

“Many abused children cling to the hope that growing up will bring escape and freedom.

But the personality formed in the environment of coercive control is not well adapted to adult life. The survivor is left with fundamental problems in basic trust, autonomy, and initiative.

She approaches the task of early adulthood ―― establishing independence and intimacy ―― burdened by major impairments in self-care, in cognition and in memory, in identity, and in the capacity to form stable relationships.

She is still a prisoner of her childhood; attempting to create a new life, she re-encounters the trauma.”

— Judith Lewis Herman

Cold winter nights

Cold rainy nights on the street… a large moving blanket was the only warmth.

“In the morning my eyes were so vacant and my face so dead, that the people I met may not even have seen me.”

— Arthur Rimbaud

The Vantage Point, Not an Advantage

In September of 1863, the Confederates occupied Lookout Mountain and Missionary Ridge. However, things quickly changed as Ulysses S. Grant is given the reins to command the Union.

It was from this location on November 24, 1863 that Confederate Troops were defeated when the Union attacked Lookout Mountain.

The Confederate Army of Tennessee, lead by General Braxton Bragg, were pushed back allowing the Union to make their way further South.

It's Okay

“It’s okay to be homeless,” he told me with dripping wet hair in the midnight rain, his shoulders covered with a moving blanket.

Words spoke aloud to another are reassurance that we are normal, we are okay, we are surviving – it is a way of handling one more night on the streets.

His words were similar to an alcoholic saying, “One day at a time.”

Following his cue while handing him a new sleeping bag I said, “It is okay to be homeless… Some travel the world while homeless.”

“I have come more and more to realize that it is being unwanted that is the worst disease that any human being can ever experience.”

— Mother Teresa (1910-1998)

When he was finally released from prison, he was a prisoner in his own body

When someone tells you they robbed 17 banks during their prime years… What’s your first thought? I guess mine was – Did you make a lot of money? My second thought… Sure, you can hop in my truck!

My friend Jerry and I were in Nashville when we met 64 year old Frank Webster. He talked about how he once robbed banks for a living while living in his hometown of Memphis, Tennessee. Of course, he only had to get caught once for him to receive a pay cut. Needless to say, getting caught also equals out of work.

Mr. Webster was all smiles and laughs. Hard to believe you could even smile after being in prison for so long and when you finally get released – you are literally an inmate trapped inside your own body.

Mr. Webster was known as inmate 00092428 when he spent the late 1980’s into the 2000’s locked up in West Tennessee. In 2014, he had a stroke while in prison.

After the stroke, Mr. Webster was transferred to the Lois M. DeBerry Special Needs Facility in Nashville. The specialized prison is for those with medical conditions, such as the aftermath of a stroke.

On December 29, 2017, just one day after his 64th birthday, he was released from prison. Finally, he was a free man. This would equal a wakeup call to a brand new world.

Nowhere to go he found himself on the streets of Nashville.

The right side of his body is about 75% paralyzed, so he scoots around on a wheelchair that was given to him. “I don’t have a doctor and I need help with stroke rehab,” he said with a thick mumble due to the stroke affecting his speech.

At night, Webster sleeps at the Nashville Rescue Mission. During the day, he watches cars go by while sitting quietly in his chair.

He pointed down the street suggesting there was a nonprofit he wanted to visit to get advice on where to go for help. It was obvious he could not make it in the wheelchair to 4th Avenue in downtown Nashville. So with a lift into the truck, thanks to Jerry Craddock, we headed towards his destination.

“Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it. ”

— Helen Keller

Domestic Violence and Rape: Dark Photograph of the Past

If you saw her today, you would never know of her past that holds a brutal memory.

“He was a body builder,” she told me in describing her college sweetheart. Little did she know there was a monster behind his eyes.

After a few months of dating, she noticed John’s temper would easily flair. Sometimes he would jerk her around by her hair or grab her arm. Needless to say, it didn’t take long for Anne Henslee to decide that she needed to end the relationship.

After the breakup and fresh out of college, she returned to her apartment one night to find that John was waiting for her. Henslee stated,  “He was hiding in the bushes and jumped out of the bushes and grabbed my key’s out of my hand - -  he took me into my apartment and beat me up all night long… raped me.”

The attack occurred in Knoxville, Tennessee where she attended college in the 1970’s. Back then, such incidents were not taken as serious as they are today. Too many times the victim would be blamed by police for playing a role in the rape or domestic violence case. Therefore, Henslee never filed charges against John. However, a woman involved in a later relationship with the man did file charges after she was raped. John was eventually found guilty in that case and was sentenced to prison.

Today, Henslee shares her story with middle school and high school students in an effort to educate children before such relationships can lead to abuse or sexual assault.

This is Anne Henslee’s story (Below):

Domestic Violence Hands Project: 

Rutherford County, Tenn. Domestic Violence & Sexual Assault Center was awarded a grant from Tennessee Arts Commission and Arts Build Communities (ABC) for "These Hands - Hope and Healing," a photographic journal project that showcases domestic violence and sexual assault survivors.

The Tennessee Arts Commission's mission is to cultivate the arts for the benefit of all Tennesseans and their communities. They invest in over 600 nonprofits and schools impacting communities in many positive ways including quality of life, economic development, and tourism.

These Hands photographic project gives a confidential voice to the survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault through their hands and their story. With domestic violence and sexual assault survivors, it is so often the hands that inflict the most hurt, violence, and trauma. We are conveying strength, hope, and recovery through our photographic story.

"The harrowing, real-life stories of domestic violence and sexual assault can be difficult to share with our community because the protection of these people is critical, to say the least," said Kara Mischke, Community Relations Manager with Domestic Violence & Sexual Assault Center. "This photographic journal project is truly going to allow others to connect with these real stories on a whole new level. Art is powerful. Art is healing."

Participating survivor's stories and hands will be unveiled in partnership with the talented photographer, blogger, and radio personality, Scott Walker - www.smalltownbigworld.org. Our story is that hands are for so much more that is positive and good. Hands are for healing, helping, loving, holding, and most of all caring and empowering those around us to make our world a better place.